The one thing we really need!

Hey you!
One thing has been so helpful for me in finding my groove as a teacher and an entrepreneur, but I bet it's not what you think!

What really drives what I do is connection. I connect with people like it's my job. OH wait, IT IS! :) It has been a very conscious decision for me, I do what I do, to help you.

How do I connect with people? What makes me so good at making others feel comfortable, understood and valuable?

The answer is simple: I listen.

BUT you know what? Not many people are great at listening. It is a skill I have worked on for a long time and it's NOT EASY.  You have to be PRESENT to really listen.  True presence is something that we desire from all of our relationships, so it's pretty natural to connect to someone when they can be that for you. 

Imagine if we were able to put aside our thoughts and ideas to listen to someone who holds the opposite point of view about a controversial subject. We would be SO much more productive.  Imagine if we could hear things that would normally trigger us, without reacting and actually HEARING the other person instead of your need to be right. We would feel so much more at peace! 

You don't have to be a WOO to master listening. If you set your mind to it, you can transform your relationships in every area. Yoga helps us to become better listeners. First we learn to observe ourselves, physically and then emotionally. We learn to figure out where all of our sore, aching and fidgety spots are in our minds. We actually get to observe our inner dialogue! When we observe, we are present, we are conscious and we begin to live in choice. Choice about how we want to behave, think, act and BE.

When we start to master our own minds, we are able to be curious about how others think and act, instead of thinking that we have figured it all out or that we have something that we need to protect/prove even when listening to another point of view. We won't feel threatened or offended easily, because before we even think about ourselves, we are able to see the other person beyond the surface and into the cause. 

What do I mean by cause? Suffering. We all suffer and we all act out or suppress because of it. When we acknowledge that suffering exists, that it sucks (because we have been there) and we don't want others to feel like that, we start to LISTEN- empathically. 

What does real quality listening require? Compassion and empathy. 

This kind of listening means paying attention to another person with emotional identification, compassion, feeling and insight. Listening takes bravery, confidence and courage. It means that you are able to seek understanding before needing to be understood.